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Hey, this is Mandy and Kim with nextTalk, where we are passionate about keeping kids safe in the digital world.
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I think most people would agree that often in the course of life, whether at work or in different circles or, in Mandy and I’s case, at a conference, you run into people that just make an impact on your life because of the story they’re willing to tell.
What happened to us recently in Florida, we met a gentleman, Ariel Delgado, who shared his testimony with Mandy and I and our team And we wanted to share it with you. Ariel is very transparent about his struggle with pornography, how it affected his life and how Jesus is using him today. Take a listen. So our nextTalk team is here at the D6 Family Conference and we kind of made friends with our sister or I should say our brother Booth next door to us, which was Family ID, And we met the guys at the booth and one of them, Ariel Delgado. He’s their program director. We were talking about Family ID, but then his story, his background and what led him to become part of Family ID we just really felt like that story needed to be told, And so I thank you, Ariel, for sharing your story with us today.
0:01:44 – Speaker 3
Thank you, kim, for having me here. So, going back a little bit and history, Thank you back with me a few years and share a little bit of my story. So I was born in South America, a beautiful country the last one by Argentina called Uruguay. My story starts when I was 11 years old, and you need to understand that I grew up in a country where, back then, to be a man, you don’t ask for help, you don’t, you’re not vulnerable, you don’t cry, you have a lot of girls and you do whatever you want and God is not for you. That’s what I learned back home. So, but I’ll tell you that 11 years old, i went through an experience that it changed my life. So when I was 11, i was working out on the field because my father was not there. I did six years of school and then I needed to support my brothers. So at 11, i was working out on the field with adults, but I was a kid. So which, again, i’m not complaining, i’m here because of that But 11 years old, i was abused sexually by another man and I never talked to anybody until 2016 because of that.
To be a man you don’t share, imagine sharing that with someone. I couldn’t, i couldn’t. So I lived in shame and guilt and for those years. but that really set the next 20 years of my life because I was a wound, that I have an emotional wound that was deep and I hide it. I just didn’t want anybody to know and that wouldn’t start bleeding. And you know, when you have a wound, what do you do? You have to take care of you, right? You have to let it heal And I didn’t do that. I hide it. But that led me to my first porn pornography exposure when I was 12 and a half, i believe. Back then there was no phones but there was magazines, so that’s what I started doing. Porn led to something else And then again it was a little chaos, but again I was a man. I just need to push forward, hide it. You don’t talk to anybody. Yes, yes, so that’s what I did. That led me to alcohol. That led me to having an emotional wound that was deep and I hide it. Intimacy with a lot of girls, having a lot of girlfriends. Again, that was the man that I learned that I needed to be so fast forward.
When I was 16, my parents got divorced. It was not a pretty divorce. It was just ugly. Yes, yes, yes, my father. Unfortunately, the enemy got a hold of him using alcohol and he wasn’t a believer, but I know today that you know, the enemy took my great-grandfather out, my father out, and then a lot of my uncles using the same alcohol. So, and he did, he wanted to do the same with me, but unfortunately that didn’t happen. That didn’t happen. But so when I was 20, it was my, my brothers, my mom and I.
I thought about moving. I was like I need to go somewhere because the economy is not great. So I thought about coming to America, but I didn’t have any money. So back then, you didn’t, you just get your passport, get on the plane and fly to America. So that’s what I did. But I came with $50 and when I came, when I left Uruguay, i didn’t have a place to stay in New York. I was just coming. Wow, i was so desperate because I needed to support my brothers. Yes, but I’m unfortunately I mean fortunately someone helped me out, and even a police officer in Grand Central train station in Manhattan. He paid for my ticket because I didn’t have any money. So all those were angels in my life, even though I didn’t believe in God and I thought this is a great opportunity for all those problems to go away running from the problem, that’s it, but the problems will follow you right.
so I got to America And after a few months I started feeling depressed. There was not even one night and I’m not kidding Kim, There was not even one night that I would put my head on the pillow and I wouldn’t feel guilt and shame for all the things that I’d done and for all the things that I went through.
0:05:36 – Speaker 2
Yeah, I believe that.
0:05:37 – Speaker 3
You know what I mean. So met my wife at the time, got married. 12 years of marriage, two beautiful daughters, 2016. Fast forward. I got a beautiful job at Chipotle. I was an area manager. I was making over $200,000. The American dream. But I wasn’t happy. I was not happy. Good, but not.
0:05:56 – Speaker 2
God.
0:05:56 – Speaker 3
Right, that’s it. So, february 5th of 2016, i had this burning desire of just be honest for the first time, because I was on that lifestyle watching porn, being unfaithful, drinking And to be in that lifestyle, you have to lie to cover your lies, and that’s what I did for a long time. And so February 6th I don’t know I had this desire to be honest and I know it was from God. So, and keep in mind, if I have to do this again, i will ask for help. But that day I didn’t know what to do, so I just unloaded on my wife. I just told her everything. I’ve been unfaithful to you, i’m addicted to porn, and she didn’t take it well, so it is a lot. So I left the house, She asked me to leave, and that night I was in a hotel and I wanted to take my own life, and I had those thoughts for a long time, but I didn’t know why. Now I understand. That’s what porn does. Pornography takes hope away from you and gets you into that depression stage And then sometimes, if you don’t get help, yes, people commit suicide sometimes, you know. So I was really close to doing that that night, february 5th, and for the first time in my life, i was like I need help. For the first time in my life imagine 2016,. I asked for help. I went to a hospital and they sent me to a mental hospital. So I ended up in a mental hospital that night. I know it wasn’t crazy, but I didn’t want to do it in stupid Yes.
So February 6th, the next day, i was like I woke up in this hospital, you locked in there, you can’t leave. You don’t have any barely any clothes on. So I was like why? Why am I here? So, remember, i didn’t believe in God. God was not real to me. So that February 6th, on that night, i went to bed and I couldn’t take the pain anymore. It was so bad that I couldn’t do it on my own anymore. So I didn’t know how to pray. But I got on my knees and I started screaming at God and calling Him names. I was like, if you real, show it to me. And literally, kim, at 10.30 pm that night, i felt as someone reaching to my chest and took that dirty, poison heart out and gave me a new heart And I had this man. It was an amazing moment. I started seeing hope and I hear voices in the room, but imagine I’m in a mental hospital, right?
0:08:09 – Speaker 2
I’m hearing voices, so you’re not telling anybody.
0:08:12 – Speaker 3
I’m probably crazy, but it was God talking to me and telling me. I’m not done with you, i have a purpose, right. So got up The next day. I was broken, for sure, but I was a new man. I wanted to go to church, i want to read the Bible, i want to do all these things that I never even thought about. You know what I mean. Yes, so got out of the hospital fast forward after five days, never took any medicine, the doctor believed me. That was the only person that believed me in the hospital. Oh, my goodness. But I can understand the nurses. Someone is telling you that, oh, i met Christ last night. Yeah, they were like really, yeah, hard to believe, especially in that environment right, i’m not a believer and in that environment, yes.
But the doctor believed me and he told me OK, i’m not going to give you any medicine, but you have to stay here for five days. That’s the protocol. So after five days I left and I had a mess outside of the hospital to fix, which unfortunately didn’t get fixed. But you know what My story? it is much bigger than all that. It was about Christ. It was about Jesus Christ, and it took me even after that day. It took me almost two years to heal from porn for Michael Hall and from all the, all the emotional wounds that I was carrying from the past. But today I’m here. I quit my job a while back and I do ministry full-time. But there’s an enemy out there that sometimes we don’t see it as an enemy. A this is you can look it up 8 out of 10 college teenagers in America are addicted to porn. So I want to talk to you, if you there, if you listen to this and if your parent, if your kid or is Out there, someone in your family is watching it.
0:09:38 – Speaker 2
You know, in nextTalk, what we talk about all the time is people think, well, they’re just watching this thing, or they’re just looking at a picture, or they’re just, you know, seeing another video, and they don’t realize that the enemy comes to kill still and destroy your family through all these different things, and Pornography is one of them, where it not only steals the heart of your child but in your marriage. It steals your marriage, then it steals the family. Yes, it hits on so many different levels. So I see your story and the brokenness there and it literally took the Holy Spirit coming and transforming your life And you being obedient right to be willing to Not just say I’m not gonna do this anymore, but a total change of life and living your life for Christ like that’s incredible.
0:10:23 – Speaker 3
Oh, thank you, Thank you, and I talked to people all the time and I shared my testimonials telling Someone at the booth, and more than 15 countries in the last two years. You’re not gonna believe how many people approach me and share with me. I’m struggling, i don’t know what to do. I’m a pastor and I’m struggling. I can’t talk to my wife. I get divorced. Yes, i talked to my pet, my lead pastor. I get fired. What do I do?
0:10:45 – Speaker 2
and they live in secrecy.
0:10:47 – Speaker 3
Shame and guilt. That’s what the enemy does. Best is shame and guilt. And even if you watch porn once a month, you are there’s problem. Yes, there’s a problem, so don’t hide it. Talk to you kiddos. The kiddos again. They’re. The porn industry wants to capture their heart and their mind. No, they’re 70 years old, because they know if they can do it at that age, when the brain is not fully developed, they’re gonna have them forever. Isn’t is an enemy that we don’t see as an enemy, but it’s out there. So talk to your kids, reach out for help. For me, the biggest help that I have right now is having someone in my corner. Imagine, you know, when you’re in a boxing fight, you go and fight. That’s life.
Life is not, you know fair sometimes Yeah and then you fight, you come back to your corner. You have some brothers around you. You have some yeah, sisters, yes it can pray for you, they can lift you up. You can be transparent, Yes you can do this alone, so let’s just bring it into the light. Let’s talk about pornography. The first time that I shared this in a church, someone told me area, really, you’re sharing porn in a church. I was like, yes, someone needs to talk about it. If we don’t talk about it, the enemy will use it even more.
0:11:51 – Speaker 2
Everything you say aligns is what we talk about here at nextTalk. We have to bring it into the light. We have to be able to talk about it openly with our kids. It is the only way, truly, we are going to save them, and you are living proof of that.
0:12:03 – Speaker 3
Yes.
0:12:03 – Speaker 2
Thank you for sharing your story, I mean it’s incredible.
0:12:06 – Speaker 3
Thank you so much, thanks for being on our show.
0:12:08 – Speaker 2
Thank you. I’m so appreciative of Ariel spending time with us at that conference and sharing his story. I mean it’s incredible what Jesus can do. If you have listened today And you’ve got a lot of questions or you’re looking for more resources to start the conversation in your house about Pornography, we want to help you.
We’ve done a couple of podcasts that we think will be helpful. One is entitled simply pornography, and we cover a lot of different topics in there and give you some conversation starters. Now there’s another show I’d like to suggest. If you think maybe your kids are hearing and seeing things and they haven’t been telling you much, check out the show. How do I get my kid to tell me what they’re seeing online? Very helpful tips on that show as well. And if you have younger kids, like I do, the idea of starting a conversation about pornography can make you sweat. But a great resource that we recommend all the time is from author Kristen Jensen And it’s called good pictures bad pictures, and she also has good pictures bad pictures, junior. Both books walk you and your kid through ways to talk about good and bad images Without overexposing them, and you can always message us through social media or find more resources at nextTalk org.
Transcribed by https://podium.page
